I Have Wrinkles, Hear Me Roar


My eldest-with-an-attitude walked out of the room on Saturday morning, saying, “Mommy, I just saw something on TV that you need.”

Yes? My curiosity piqued, while rallying them to get ready for early morning swimming lessons.

“It’s for someone who has wrinkles and, Mommy, you have lots of wrinkles.”

There was a moment’s reflection–a choice: I could either get huffy about her calling out my wrinkles (how dare she?) or I could choose that higher road.

“I like my wrinkles,” I told her, my heart turning soft towards her, but also rising strong with feminine power. I hate those ads and I didn’t want to let them win.

“I embrace my wrinkles,” I told her. I felt defiant, not towards her, but towards those voices that say Beauty could only be perfect.

Take that!

She looked puzzled.

“It means I am growing wiser and more beautiful on the inside. I like growing older.”

She was still a little puzzled, but I wanted her to know I embrace my body with belly and wrinkles and post-birthing-babies pimples. I will stand before her and embrace this stuff of imperfection, because I want her to be strong and embrace her body. Love her body, even.

It’s not always true. Seeing my wrinkles on a photograph that first time was a bit of a shock. Seriously?! But in that moment when she commented, I wanted to be there for her … for her relationship with her body and her future wrinkles and her hair and her arms and her thighs and her feet, or whatever body part she may some day question.

I wanted to speak Hope and Grace to imperfection, so, hopefully, she may one day do so too.

  • Elfie

    Wow, what a wise response. God bless all you young mothers out there with grace and wisdom as you model to your daughters how you are at peace with your bodies!

    • idelette

      Trying my best. Praying on my feet, mostly!

  • Shelagh

    My two best friends have wrinkles, neither of them thirty yet. Not wrinkle wrinkles, laugh lines and crows feet. We joke about how much deeper they’ll get as we grow older and there’s a part of me that’s jealous of them. Lines like that only come from doubled over belly laughs and big ugly tears. From deep emotion. I look at them, at their developing wrinkles, and it’s like they have love on their faces – and they become all the more beautiful to me. You don’t have wrinkles, you have love etched into your face – and it is stunning. Why would ou ever want to cover that up?

    • http://www.twitter.com/teenbug Tina/@teenbug


      Shelagh, “You have love etched in your face.”

      YES YES YES!

      She sooo does!


      • idelette

        Thank you, sweet friend. YOU make the Love etched on my face look good. #magicfingers

    • idelette

      Wow, Shelagh–those are some amazing words … I want to write it on my mirror! I LOVE it!!!!!!

  • http://www.sarahbessey.com Sarah Bessey

    You are so my favourite. You, too? ME, TOO. xo

    • idelette

      Whew! What a DAY/weekend! Lady Wisdom, please keep coming coming coming. Our girls aren’t even teenagers yet …

  • http://www.ubuntina.wordpress.com neritia

    Each little line is gorgeous….and minuscule…you gorgeous woman!

    I’m going to remember this little “lesson” of yours the next time my nieces ask me about mine…!

    I love Shelagh’s comment…..love on your face!

  • http://www.walkingtochina.blogspot.com Sandy

    I love this! I am much older than you and not terribly wrinkled….all though thinking of it as loved etched in my face makes it almost appealing. But I am going severely grey…and I kind of like it! I am 50, not 30 and I should look like a 50 year old. The grey just means a natural progression in life…same as the wrinkles.

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  • KatieJune

    Wow, what a wonderful post to wake up to on Sunday morning. As a mother to three girls, this rings true. They are under five years old, but it is my mission to arm them with self confidence, love of their bodies and a sense of self. I loved reading this…and loved Shelagh’s comment. May we all have love etched into our faces!

  • Denise

    I will be 50 in September. I am told I look 40. What is 40? I have wrinkles and I don’t mind them. I love that comment. Love etched into your face. I welcome the “hoary head” of which the Bible speaks. My only hope is that the wisdom develops apace with the grey hair and wrinkles.